The World Changes in a Matter
of Minutes
I can either be Dolly Parton or
Twiggy of the 70's

Over The Rainbow .... there is a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow ..... as one is diagnosed with breast cancer; you are at the beginning a huge thunderstorm with flashes of lightning and then buckets of rain with a rainbow with all the rain from the diagnosis that you become a part of .... the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow that we are all looking for is the cure for Breast Cancer.

Breast Cancer is much like a huge thunderstorm or thunderhead building, with a lot of lightning and tons of rain with rainbow of colors from the rain and storm or the black side (the diagnosis) or the beginning, and as you begin the climb out of the rain toward the rainbow through the reds, purples, blues, greens, yellows, oranges to the pot of gold (the Cure) the brightest color being pink for hope, love, and surviving.

Thirty two years ago on October 15th was my dark day when all the storm broke loose when I had a biopsy on a lump in my left breast. As I lay on the surgery table joking with my surgeon and aethestia doctor about our children and ensundry things, over the intercom came the results of the biopsy ... malignancy ... my surgeon said you know what that means ... yes I did ... during the next six years the climb up the rainbow, up some and sliding back -- things were looking up ... brighter and more colorful and always looking for the pot of gold and then ...

Six years later, I fell back to the bottom of the rainbow when the storm once again poured tons of rain by returning to the internist, who following a mammogram, sent me back to the surgeon ... yes, a lump on the other side ... I now could chuckle because I could be flat chested like Twiggy of the 70's or voluptuous like Dolly Parton ... whatever my mood ... but you know me for me not my bustline.

So now I am a bilateral ... over the thirty two years I have visited numerous patients through the Reach to Recovery Program to listen to their tale, to show them exercises, prosthesis and that they may return to a full life ....
I have had tears of joy and saddness (the 26 year old who didn't want the statistics but wanted to know if she would see her daughter walk down the aisle or hold her grandchild ... No she didn't) or
the high school 17 year old cheerleader after a talk with her class walked up and apologized for her classmates not listening and she had already had 12 biopsys, or
the patient whose husband informed her that if she returned from surgery without breasts, he wouldn't be around. No, he wasn't around when she came out of surgery)
to the numerous chuckles (i.e. the woman who was in the surgeons office for a followup visit, and putting a hem in, and would place the pins from the hem in her blouse. The gentleman across from her was starring so hard and she was put out that she reached in her bag, pulled out a darning needle and jammed it in the right side of her breast ... the man fainted, little did he know that she was wearing a fiber filled prosthesis; or
the dear lady I visited at Via Christi who was so tickled to receive a temporary fiber filled prosthesis that she slept with it, and shocked the night nurse making rounds; or the lady who made her own prosthesis of birdseed. When she went to visit her son in Mississippi, she placed in on the back of the commode. In the morning it had turned green .... the birdseed had sprouted). My memories are many.

Yes, my husband left me .... contended it wasn't my surgery; but I feel it had some affect. No, I did not have implants though I visited a reconstructive surgeon. Though I am a woman and treasured my bustline, I was leary of the implants, and you know me for who I am, not my bustline.

My latest joy or thrill in my rainbow, was riding in the Victory Lap for Breast Cancer as the NASCAR Race on the Kansas Speedway in 2004. It was fantastic looking up in the stands and hearing the people cheer or giving you thumbs up as you rode around the track.

I am involved with the Race for the Cure in different facets, data input, chairing Decorate the PortaPotties as well as making a quilt to be given away at the Race.

Hopefully someday someone will find the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow ... a Cure for Breast Cancer ...but until then one has to enjoy all the various colors of life, hope and faith.